Culture Shock: Japan Edition

Understanding Culture Shock in Japan

Culture shock is a term used to describe the discomfort and disorientation accompanying a transition from a familiar culture or environment to an unfamiliar one. This phenomenon is particularly relevant when living in a foreign country, an experience that is often both exciting and educational but not without its challenges.

Much like throwing a stone into a still pond, the initial impact of cultural immersion can be exhilarating, sending ripples of new experiences cascading through our lives. These ripples of adjustment become less frequent and less intense as time passes. However, they never truly disappear, constantly shaping and reshaping our perspective in significant yet subtle ways.

While this experience is hardly limited to Japan, the cultural norms here can be particularly challenging to grasp, causing confusion and sometimes frustration. Like ripples on water, the cultural 'shocks' we encounter in Japan continue to surprise and perplex us. Interestingly, even long-term residents find that this continues to happen, even years after they think they have come to understand Japan and their place in it.

The first "splash" in the pond represents our initial excitement upon arriving to discover the neon lights, efficient rail transport, tiny back streets, and well-mannered people. Subsequently, we experience waves of discovery—sometimes gentle, sometimes more pronounced—that continue to shape our journey.

Much like throwing a stone into a still pond, the initial impact of cultural immersion can be exhilarating, sending ripples of new experiences cascading through our lives. These ripples of adjustment become less frequent and less intense as time passes.

These cultural ripples serve a vital purpose. They keep us engaged and alert and teach us about our adopted home. For some, these moments of cultural disconnect can be invigorating, sparking curiosity and personal growth. For others, they might cause anxiety or confusion. However, it's crucial to understand that this phenomenon is a natural part of the expatriate experience, affecting almost everyone who lives outside their native country.

Culture shock is, in essence, a stimulating life event. It heightens our awareness of our surroundings and can be a powerful catalyst for personal change and adaptation. While it may sometimes challenge us emotionally, it also presents an incredible opportunity for growth, understanding, and developing a deeper appreciation for the richly unique aspects of another culture.

Several factors affect your ability to cope with adapting to Japan. For instance, you'll probably miss the familiar support networks provided by friends and family back home. You'll likely be dealing with an unfamiliar language, food, and customs. And, not surprisingly, you'll find yourself an outsider more often than not.

The duration and intensity of culture shock vary from person to person. Your response to it is greatly affected by the strength and breadth of your support system, your work, your relationships, how flexible and adaptable you are to change, how radical the differences are between the culture and customs here and back home, the depth of your desire to be here, and your level of emotional security.

Culture Shock is kinda like Alcoholics Anonymous. There's a step-by-step process for dealing with it.

Phases of Culture Shock

Most theories on culture shock divide the phenomenon into four phases: Honeymoon, Homesickness, Hatred, and Home—the four (out of 5!) Fs. However, it is vital to note that the progression from one phase to the next is not always linear, and it is possible to move backward and forward.

The Honeymoon Phase: Euphoria

When you first arrive in Japan, chances are you'll be excited about the new experience and get a charge from encountering all the new and exciting things around you. This honeymoon phase can last for a while, generally from three to six months. During this period, you'll likely be the most productive and energetic version of yourself, thriving on meeting new people, exploring your surroundings, trying new foods, and getting to grips with the lingo.

The Homesick Phase: Disintegration

As time progresses, you might notice that the new experiences and challenges you loved so much a few months before have lost their appeal. The language, different weather, social customs, food, and living arrangements no longer seem so novel. Instead, the gaps between Japan and your home country become painfully apparent, and your attention shifts from the entertaining quirks of your new home to what you have lost by coming here.

This is the homesick phase, which is likely to be the low point of your time in Japan. You may feel lonely, irritated, isolated, or confused—feelings compounded by the distance separating you from your friends and family. Simple tasks, such as handling bills or ordering food, can become overwhelming, leading to frustration and a longing for the familiarity of home.

The Hatred Phase: Reintegration

The more aware you become of the differences between Japanese culture and your own, the better position you will be in to reconcile the two. However, this is not always an easy process.

The reintegration phase can be marked by some powerful emotions: feelings of anger, frustration, and even a sense of hostility toward your new home. You will become more aware of what you dislike about Japan and what you miss about back home. "Japan-bashing" is a common symptom of this phase; you may say things you don't really mean or stereotype the Japanese as a way of venting your emotions. This is a natural part of adjusting, but finding healthy outlets for these feelings and avoiding alienating local friends and colleagues is essential.

The Home Phase: Autonomy and Independence

After a while, the tension and irritation caused by the differences in living in Japan begin to fade. You'll start to feel more in control and—as you become familiar with your surroundings and day-to-day existence—more at home. Although there may still be minor things that irk you, you'll be able to deal with them better and know whether they deserve attention. Your ability to cope with new situations will improve, which in turn will increase your self-confidence. One day, you'll wake up and feel like you are at home, or at least in your home away from home.

You will become more aware of what you dislike about Japan and what you miss about back home. "Japan-bashing" is a common symptom of this phase; you may say things you don't really mean or stereotype the Japanese as a way of venting your emotions.

Coping with Culture Shock

If you find yourself in the throes of culture shock, in whatever form it manifests, there are ways to deal with the experience and help turn your attitude around so that you can enjoy life in Japan. Here are some strategies to consider:

Pace Yourself
You may be tempted to load your plate to the max with lessons and activities, but be realistic. Taking on too much can lead to burnout and a sense of failure. Instead, make small, attainable, realistic goals for yourself and set about achieving them. Learn how to use the ATM or your remote control, or go to the shops to buy a unique item you have been looking for. Small triumphs will help combat the frustrations you experience while adjusting.

Stay in Touch with Home
Your friends and family may not be physically close by, but they are often little more than a text or video chat away. Maintaining contact with home can help alleviate the loneliness and isolation commonly associated with culture shock. Regular conversations with loved ones can provide emotional support and remind you that you are not alone. Yet, as time goes by and the more you acclimate, you will notice that some aspects of what you are dealing with may be unrelatable to others back home. Take this as a sign that your understanding has grown. Sometimes, contextualizing your thoughts for others to understand is a way of taking agency over your situation and finding stability and self-awareness.

Express Yourself
Finding someone who will listen unconditionally and uncritically to your problems is essential for anyone experiencing culture shock. This could be a friend or family member from home, one of the foreigners or Japanese you meet here, or a counselor. Expressing how you feel is healthy, and for many people, that is the best way of working the problem out of their system. Keeping a diary or scrapbook can also be therapeutic, allowing you to process your experiences and emotions on paper.

Exercise and Eat Healthy
Plenty of exercise can be the most beneficial way to deal with your frustrations. Regular exercise and a healthy diet can do wonders for your mood and attitude when you are adjusting to your new environment. Simple activities like walking, jogging, or joining a local gym can help lift your spirits and keep depression and anxiety at bay.

Become Linguistically Empowered
You may feel more confident if you learn some Japanese. Instead of trying to become fluent in Japanese right away, focus on learning useful phrases, understanding signs, and practicing words for daily tasks. Learning essential phrases and words can give you a sense of achievement and help you grasp the culture of the country. Taking a basic language class or using language learning apps can be very helpful. Don't be afraid to practice with locals; most people will appreciate your efforts and offer encouragement.

Be Rational
It's worth remembering that you're in another country and that only some things will be done in the same way or for the same reasons as back home. Try to see things here as "different" rather than "wrong" or "bad." If you find yourself regularly making rude, off-the-cuff comments about Japan and the Japanese, evaluate why these differences annoy you. As the theologian Reinhold Niebuhr said: "Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference."

Culture Shock is kinda like Alcoholics Anonymous. There's a step-by-step process for dealing with it.

Seek Counseling
You might consider counseling if you're still having a hard time. This may be the best option for anyone who has dealt with mental health issues before or who has come to Japan to escape problems at home, such as abuse, divorce, or relationship difficulties. Even if you have never considered seeing a counselor, seeking help can provide valuable support and strategies for coping with culture shock. While in-person English counseling can be challenging to find or expensive, some counselors are available in Nagoya. Additionally, many people have found online counseling to be beneficial.

Culture Shock is kinda like Alcoholics Anonymous. There's a step-by-step process for dealing with it.

Personal Circumstances

Culture shock can raise specific issues, depending on whether you are here as part of a family, couple, or on your own, or if you are a woman or parent.

Couples
Coming to Japan can be a significant strain on a relationship. Both you and your partner are adjusting to a new life. The support base you created for each other in your home country might be less reliable and robust once you settle here. When only one member of the couple works, additional problems can arise. The working partner has a built-in support network through their job. In contrast, the non-working partner may feel isolated and unsupported. It's crucial to communicate openly and support each other through this transition.

Family and Children
If you're bringing your kids along to Japan, remember that they may suffer the effects of culture shock right along with you. Thanks to their natural resiliency and adaptation skills, kids usually bounce back much more quickly than adults. However, children may act out or become withdrawn if they struggle with the adjustment. Encouraging them to make friends, both Japanese and foreign, and involving them in extracurricular activities can help them feel more settled. Additionally, connecting to your home culture through regular communication and cultural activities can provide comfort and stability.

Women
Living in Japan can affect foreign women in different ways than men. The status of women here is still comparatively low, and it can be a real blow to your self-confidence to see the way other women are treated and viewed. In some situations, sexual harassment is still not considered a significant issue, and you will find that some people tend to laugh it off instead of dealing with it seriously. You may feel that you are not fulfilling your potential at work due to language restrictions or the corporate structure.

Additionally, women often feel that their foreign male counterparts are favored by the Japanese system, and yes, Japanese women. This is known colloquially as the "Charisma Man" syndrome. Interestingly, women often fare better in the long run, as they have frequently dealt with marginalized situations where they have had to deal with an imbalance of power. On the other hand, foreign men get somewhat "lazy" with their relatively easy life when they first get here. This leads to problems when men discover that their "charisma" wears off and are treated less favorably as they age. Building a support network of other foreign women and discussing your experiences can help you navigate and better understand these challenges.

Bicultural Families
If you are moving here with a Japanese spouse and/or your children, you may discover that you are experiencing the same adjustment issues as other couples but with a completely different spin. The foreign partner may feel highly dependent on the Japanese partner, to whom the surrounding environment is natural and comfortable. It can be more difficult to vent frustrations about your new home to a Japanese partner, who may see complaints as a personal affront. Open communication and mutual understanding are crucial to maintaining a healthy relationship.

Singles
For the single person moving to Japan, many of the same issues noted above will arise: depression, loneliness, homesickness, and feelings of isolation from your home country, as well as from Japan and Japanese people. Without the built-in support network of a relationship or family, singles may find it all too easy to withdraw and only socialize with people from similar backgrounds. Making a concerted effort to meet Japanese people and join local clubs or groups can help you feel more connected to your new home.

This may seem like a lot to deal with, but remember that culture shock is a shared experience that can either catalyze personal growth or lead to resistance. Embrace the ripples, for they are the echoes of your journey, constantly reminding you of the vibrant life you are building in Japan.

About the Author
Carter Witt is the founder of this blog and has been active in publishing in Japan for over 30 years. He currently works at the Hayakawa Mental Health Clinic in Issha. In this role, he assists English-speaking foreign nationals with their psychiatric diagnoses and treatment and helps them navigate the Japanese National Health System.